A tale of 2.

This blog post brought to you by the good people at the wine store. (And girlfriends, of course).

As I was driving home tonight, I was thinking over a conversation that my girlfriend and I had at dinner. A conversation about guys, life, relationships, work, and well... growing up and trying to make it work. A conversation about being ourselves and finding someone who understood that at the end of the day.... And it got me thinking.

I am sarcastic...

... because it's easy, and it's a wall.

I have walls...

... for protection from those around me.

I smile and laugh...

... when crying would be easier.

I'm a little crazy...

... because it's more fun that way.

I am strong...

... because that is my option.

I have dreams and goals...

... because I want more for myself.

I want to work with kids...

... because there is always hope.

I stand up for what I believe in...

... even when it's not popular.

I fight...

... because I have passion.

I get offended...

... because I know what I want & what I deserve.

I know how I should be treated...

... so it's what I expect.

I know how to treat others...

... so that's what I do.

I look to my grandparents (and parents)

love and devotion...

... and know it must be out there for me.

I love...

... even with the risk of getting hurt.

I trust...

... when I sometimes shouldn't.

I believe...

... because I know that love exists and endures.

It doesn't make coming home to an empty apartment much easier though. Sometimes? It's nice to have a hand to hold while going through the difficult parts in life.

Martina McBride has a new song, called "I'm gonna love you through it," and while it's a song about a woman who is just diagnosed with breast cancer and her husbands statement that he will always be there, these lyrics bring tears to my eyes every time. It is a song like this, that makes me remember my mom's words to me as well, "Someday, there will be a man who will accept and love all of you. He will be strong enough to handle everything you bring to the table." -Here's hoping, Mom!

When you're weak, I'll be strong

When you let go, I'll hold on

When you need to cry, I swear that I'll be there to dry your eyes

When you get lost, scared to death

Like you cant take one more step

Just take my hand, together we can do it

I'm gonna love you through it

So, if you made it this far?

I think after Christmas? It's time for a pet.

PYHO: This must be happy?

It's Wednesday, and it's time for Pour Your Heart Out, with Shell. As always, be nice, link up, but keep in mind that people are in fact, putting themselves out there.

Today, I am happy.

Today, was the first day that I trained the "new me."

Today, I will spend time with JM, the man who has grown so much recently and become the man I love.

Today, I smile because I know that I am more and more like myself these days.

Today, I am happy.

Today, I am glad for my family, and my sister who passed her nursing boards, and for my friends who got to spend time with their family.

Today, I am happy that I heard from SR's mom, and that they are doing well.

Today I am happy to have reconnected with a friend who shares a love for sprinkles, sparkles and bling.

Today, although it's wicked hot outside (and no, I am not from Boston, but seriously, how cool would that be) I will smile through the sweat.

Today, I am looking forward to a vacation with that man that I love.

Today, I am excited for tomorrow. I am excited for the smiles. The laughter, the memories. The fun. The tears.

And today, I'm seriously excited that JM is folding socks, because who actually likes that part of the laundry? ;)

Finding your purpose: I haven't even after 50

I joined a blogging website/help society type of thing a couple weeks ago.

They keep sending me emails (it's a daily thing) about how to "find your voice."

Or to "find your blog's purpose."


It kind of drives me crazy. The point of starting this blog was to start to find out who I am, what I like to write and have a "journal" of sorts to document my 20s and beyond.

It's in my blog title.

I have no idea what this blog is going to be about in the end. It kind of jumps all over.

I'm not a person blogging about how to plan a wedding. Or being a mom. Or being in school and getting a job. Or being married through the first year.

I don't really have a total purpose. And sometimes, I feel bad. And then I say... "F this game" I just want to write.

So, for all those of you who have blog purpose, I applaud you. I hope you don't stop being my follower because I haven't found mine yet.

However, I think that when I get a puppy, it could have a common thread running through it of "IlovemydogIhatepottytrainingmydogHe'ssocuteIcan'tstandit."


Stick with me til then? I think it'll be good. Until then, I'm just another girl, who's struggling.

Gah. At least I have friends who send me emails who make me laugh. Because what good is struggling if you're not at least laughing the whole time anyways?! Seriously.

Also, this is my 50th post. HOly cow-sers :) That's pretty sweeeet, but seriously, still searching for purpose? Annoyance.

Meet, Re-Greet, and a Pre-Weekend Update

So, tonight I get to go to dinner with a fun fabulous sprinkle-tastic friend that I haven't seen in ages. We are getting sushi, I am seeing her new apartment. We will gossip, and giggle, and take pictures, and it will be epic.

Yes. I just used EPIC in a sentence. Impressed? Again, I say yes.

And, over 4th of July? I might get to see my Twinner from high school. I haven't seen her since our 5 year reunion over Christmas, and well... she lives about 2 hours away, and it's just about time that we made a special fabulous trip to see eachother. And what better way or time, than on a 3 day weekend?

If you're thinking there isn't one, you would be correct!

Also, this weekend? Yea. I'm going to a NASCAR race.

What. the. heck. do. people. do. at. NASCAR. races?!?!?! I'm so confused. I never "got" NASCAR. Oh well, it's a day to hang out and be with friends, I guess? And come back to work on Monday without any hearing capabilities.

And.

I.

Might.

Get.

To.

Skype.

With.

JS!!!!

This truly is epic. Well, because, we haven't "seen" eachother since she left. And her life has been totally bananas since moving back to TX, what with getting married, and settling into her new apartment and married life.

So this is thrilling. And super exciting. And makes me happy. Yay.

All in all, it's going to be a great weekend I do believe.

Oh, and hey. Only 16 more days til JM and I are in San Diego. On the first!!! vacation ever we will take together, just us since we started dating over 2 years ago. Yea. I'm more excited than well, say the Easter Bunny on Christmas morning.

Whatever, you get it.

Expect pictures. Actually, expect lots of pictures. I know we (and by we, I mean I) have been totally sucking on the uploading of the photos. Maybe that'll be a project for tonight... But hey, no promises k?

xoxo *W

PS. A Friday Flip-Off cuz I haven't done one in a while...
To the Med student who has made my life a living miserable painful want-to-poke-my-eyes-out-with-a-rusty-fork type of week? Flip-off. I am done bending over backwards every time you decide you can "fit me in," and make me over 30 minutes late to leave work on Tuesday, which I may not get paid for. Flip. Off. Please and ThANK YOUU

Over the river and through...

well, you know the rest.

I am going back to Rochester tomorrow for a WHOPPING 5 whole days!! I am so excited to be back there, have more than 27 hours off, and to celebrate a whole lot of things.

On the agenda for celebrations:
My (baby) brother's high school graduation (GAH!!!! I feel SO old, this is not ok.) When I graduated from high school, and realized that he wouldn't graduate until 2010, I said, "Wow, self, that is super far away." And now it's here. And while there were times that he didn't think he would make it through (thank you, high school bullsh*t, you truly are over-rated) he did it, and I am so excited to witness the next part of his journey. With a soccer ball at his feet of course! (And his birthday, but seriously, there is a lot of celebrating going on at a graduation party. Don't worry Andrew, there are presents for both, I promise! :))

My Grandpa "Crunchy"s 80th birthday. Sure to be a great time surrounded by the entire Clark side of the family, this part of the weekend will be fun, celebratory and a time to catch up and relax around eachother.

My Mom's big FIVE-OH birthday. Love you, Mom! Sorry I couldn't be there on Sunday, but I promise, there will be great hugs, smiles, pictures and happiness. I am so lucky to have such a great mother who is such a great example as to what love and strength are.

My sister's birthdays (because I didn't make it home for those either, yikes, I am sucking as a big sis) Because even though turning 22 is totally lame, everyone needs to celebrate the one-year-anniversary-of-turning-21. And what better way to do it than with a lovely raspberry martini by the pool? And a pedicure and manicure too if we can squeeze it in!

Father's Day with my Dad, Gramps, and Grandpa. All. In. The. Same. Place. Totally crazy, but I am so happy to be home for a Father's Day where everyone is together. Yay!

And, with any trip back to Rochester, it will be full of trips to Wegmans, hopefully a trash plate (pictures to come, I promise. Seriously. So. Good. And soooo fabulously unhealthy!) lots of pictures, changing weather every 3 minutes, getting thrown into a pool once, twice, and let's be serious, probably 5 times, bon-fires, laughing, crying and lots of time together with those I love.


And by the time Monday comes around, may be a little tired of.

Ha. Ha. Ha.

You can expect some blog picture updates. I don't promise an update til I get back, but hey, you never know. ;)

And, while you're here, be sure to check out my fun friends that are new to the bloggy world, K and B. Show them some comment love, and be sure to drop me one too!

PS. New favorite flavor of coffee from DD: Toasted Almond. Seriously, do it. This is not something you regret.

A Guest Post by the ONE and ONLY

Ok everyone, be excited. I have decided that while I am super funny, I have some super funny and extremely insightful friends. They're smart, funny, fabulous, and they have great things to say. And sometimes, it just helps to write things out.

So, what I'm trying to say, is MEET MARIA! She's my new fabulous friend from school, and well... we'll let her take it away from here :) And seriously, read, leave comments, and send me some more followers! Read the whole thing, it's a very realistic introduction, and well... Maria doesn't hold much back. It's part of the reason we get along so well.

And so it begins. How to start this fun new part of my existence? Do i start by introducing myself? Do I jump into being ridiculous, inappropriate, insightful, longwinded, and just downright hilarious? Or....do I explain how I came to meet the wonderful Whitney Lill. I guess I could do it all since that would probably make the most sense.

Hello, My name is Maria and I am addicted to...I just realized that I have two different socks on. Welcome to my life. I like to think of myself as not someone who marches to the beat of their own drummer but as the person who steals the drum and leads a whole new parade. I wouldn’t say it’s because I like to be in control but because this way I can make sure that everyone is smiling and having fun. That’s how I met Whitney. No don’t worry I didn’t steal her drum...I stole her boyfriend. Hahaha Just kidding...I’m a big Lesbo :)

Whitney and I are both Social Work Grad Students. What do we have in common you ask? We are both ridiculously inappropriate which is absolutely wonderful in ever possible way. We like to question why things are the way they are...and we probably won’t stop until we get an answer we like...so we won’t be stopping anytime soon. Whitney is running St. Baldrick’s and I’m shaving my head. I can’t wait!! Oh and of course, we are dating the same boy...DUH!!! (again..just kidding!!)

So you may be asking yourself...or you may have already stopped reading...why is this random lesbo writing for Whitney’s blog. Well that would be because Whitney asked me to. For some reason she thinks I have interesting things to say. I like to think that she has a point in that...but what do I know. I think she is just trying to be nice to her Token Lesbian friend. Just kidding buddy :)

And so it comes to a close. I figure I should keep the first guest blog leaving you wanting more. For those of you who don’t know me...I ask you to not judge and to keep an open mind. I am not sure what I will find inspiration in to write about. I have been through a lot and seen even more. I would do anything for those I care about and would give my life for those I love. I am a big dork and love to laugh all the time. I love piercings and tattoos and plan on getting more. I have designed all of my tattoos and they all have personal meaning to me. In about a month I will look like G.I. Jane and I cannot wait!! I have no idea what tomorrow will hold and that both scares the shit out of me and excites me to no end. I love to play ice hockey and I love getting lost in a good book. I usually get mistaken for a 12 year old boy and I have some really good stories of people being embarrassed because they have mistakenly addressed me as such. Sometimes life can be a real piece of work...but we make it through and THAT is truly inspiring.

~Maria...Over and Out

See??!! I told you, she's great!